Thursday, July 06, 2006

So there I was...

...Just enjoying a quiet lunch and reading the paper. Today's Houston Comical certainly lived up to its name. Needless to say there was extensive front page coverage on the death of Ken Lay. Allow me to briefly summarize:
  1. His death was "tragic."
  2. The editorial page paints Lay as the hero in a Greek tragedy (their words, not mine.)
  3. Astros owner Drayton McLane says that he made Houston a better city.
  4. A man of the cloth says that he was a unique philanthropist (aren't philanthropists supposed to give money away?)
  5. The former mayor thinks of him as a good and decent man.
  6. His trial was stressful and could have exacerbated his condition. Those mean old Feds. How dare they prosecute a weak old man?
It goes on and on. Now I'm not one for conspiracy theories, but :

Fed's announce last week their intention to seize $43 million dollars in assets...load family up for one last trip...take cardiac arrest inducing drug undetectable by toxicology tests...pending criminal case is vindicated...family keeps assets/gets nice trip to Colorado...government gives up and files no civil charges against the estate.

Yup, that about covers it. If you ask me, in one final act of greed, Ken Lay "took one for the team." But then again...what do I know? I'm just sad that I got beat to the punch about asking the question "Who knew he even had a heart?"

5 comments:

Southern Fried Girl said...

Yeah, I was all busted up that he kicked it.

Chickenhawk said...

It's amazing how far people will go to avoid saying anything bad about the dead, eh? Either that or else all of those people quoted have the worst cases of amnesia EVER!

Seriously folks... did you really forget the mess this guy caused? or the lives he RUINED?? uh, HELLLO???

kat said...

i personally think he was like the grinch with a heart that was two sizes too small. then it just shrunk wwwaaayyyyy smaller to the size of a grain of dust, and his furry little heart just broke. as for all those who like him, they're just at the two sizes too small stage.

granted your scenario is more realistic (and probably reality) i prefer to include cartoon characters in my conspiracies.

'Mazing Amy said...

sooo ridiculous that I do not even have words for it.

Sigh.

Okie said...

sumbitch